The Invitation

i did it!!  i actually finished my first ever extended fast.  i have never gotten very far in attempting to fast as i am hypoglycemic (i wonder what the dutch word is for that??) and so i've never gotten too far on the whole fasting thing, but i really sensed Jesus asking me to try it again and to give it 5 days!!!!  so, i did and it was really amazing!  yes, i did eat my evening meal but made it through my first 5 days w/out passing out, and i had such an awesome time.  i was reminded over & over again of just how merciful and generous and extravagant our Jesus is...especially when we step out & take a risk in obeying Him!!!

i really felt called into this fast to get up closer to Jesus and to give Him back some of the burdens that i kept taking back for myself...things that i have been calling the 'mountains' that will need to be moved before we can seriously make this move to Amsterdam.  i know these are 'mountains' that God Himself will have to move, but i kept looking at my/our own very limited resource and wondering 'how' this is ever going to work??  anyway, i was soon to realize that 'my' plan and God's plan in this fast were different (surprise, surprise!!)

the first day of my fast was sept.2, 2008.  as i've done for the past 25 years i read my chambers devotion to start off my day.  the title was "The Sacrament of Sacrifice" and he referenced Mary of Bethany pouring out the ointment on Jesus head...and in the closing chapter he says, "it is time now to break the life, to cease craving for satisfaction, and to spill the thing out.  Our Lord is asking who of us will do that for Him?"

i read it over again.  it was one of those devotions that really grabbed me.  i knew that Jesus was really wanting me to 'get it'.  all those passages about 'losing your life' and 'dying to self' were being brought to mind.  i was drawn into the presence of our heavenly Father and it was sweet...but challenging.  

my time of fasting and praying continued on and by day 3 i knew i really needed to take some time to journal about everything that Jesus was speaking to me during this fast.  so much was being said and i didn't want to miss anything, so i packed up my journal, Bible, Chambers devotional, and left for Starbucks.  i couldn't believe it when i opened my journal to start writing....

journal entry Aug. 31, 2007!!!  LUNCH WITH ERIC PICKERILL.....

FREAKING OUT....WHAT I PLANNED TO TALK W/ ERIC ABOUT SEEMED LIKE SO NOT WHAT GOD WAS DOING.  

THE INVITATION was given to pray about considering joining them in this mission to Amsterdam!!

journal entry Sept. 2, 2007!!!  Chambers..."the Lord is asking WHO of us will do this for Him?"

Is God calling us to 'sacrafice' everything and join Him in this mission to Amsterdam??

and we know the answer.  so NOT what i was expecting.  so NOT what i had planned for at my little lunch w/ eric.  so NOT what i ever thought God was ask me to do with my life.  didn't fit.  too scary.  too risky.  too costly.  

and then the Holy Spirit reminded me of my personal prayer the year prior....that i would be know to my kids, grandkids, others as a woman after God's heart.  that i would never be allowed to 'settle in' and get comfortable.  that i would always take risks for the Kingdom.  that i would surrender all my gifts, talents, abilities to be used by the Lord however and whenever and 'wherever' He chose (should have left out the 'wherever' part).  that i would be white hot for Jesus until the day i could not.  that i would finish the race well.

be very careful what you pray for.  it is clear our Jesus takes us much more seriously than we take ourselves!!  He calls us out.  He invades our space.  He messes with our plans.  

He invites us into His dance!!!  He invites us to leap mountains with Him!!  He challenges us out of our comfort zone!!  

He answers our prayers.

He reminds us of our history.  He has proven faithful in my life time & time again.  He has shown me His mercy & grace over & over again.

He dares us to dream.

And then i was reminded that as John Wimber said, "faith is spelled r-i-s-k".  This is the life i want.  to be fully alive, fully engaged...taking risks with Jesus until i can't!!!

thank you Eric for inviting me/us into your dream.

thank you Jesus for inviting me/us into your dance.

thank you my tif & d', aubrei, a'daira, ayden, josh & abby, ali, & levi for releasing us to accept this invitation.  you are truly making a costly sacrifice.  but, this is Jesus plan for you too!!  do you hear His invitation to you?  what dance is He inviting you into?  i hope you dance!

thank you church for releasing me/us.  for challenging us.  for allowing us to dream.

and to all who are reading this blog, our Jesus invites you too!!  "who will do this for me?"

i hope you dance!

animal house

i guess you don't have to be living in amsterdam to be experiencing 'issues' with animals!!  i figure since my amazing team leaders have shared their most urgent prayer requests with all of you blog readers then we are free to share our animal stories & prayer requests as well!!  

so here is a peek into my week thus far...

i awoke last thursday to find my beloved parakeet (nameless) laying all crumpled up in his food dish.  dead.  very dead.  and did you know that when birds die (or at least 'my' bird) they don't get all stiff like people....they get all crumpled.  i was so saddened.  i called bernie @ work to share the tragic news (in tears).  he graciously offered to come home over lunch and properly dispose (take out in a garbage bag) of my beloved nameless parakeet.  In all fairness to bernie he did offer to give my bird a proper burial in the back yard next to the fish pond.

bernie has gained some wisdom over the years.  he kept his insensitive animal comments to himself & very quietly 'disposed' of the bird!

i did thank God that the bird died in my home & not after i had given him to my granddaughters.  bernie thanked God that the bird died in his food dish and all he had to do was remove the food dish w/ the bird in it!!

THEN for my dog 'issues'...

Ryo (the Dutch word for 'emotional black hole) has allergies every summer.  Of course this summer is the worst she has ever been!  We have been keeping her little cone on her head so she cannot chew herself up, BUT she is as smart as julia's mice and has figured out how to work her little cone off! We came home from church on Sunday to find Ryo in my bedroom chewing away at herself!!!   She had her entire back end chewed up so bad she was bleeding!!!  I could/can hardly stand to look at her.  We are giving her Benadryl around the clock!  Any suggestions??  Maybe I should be googling!!  

AND both of our cats are having allergy 'issues' as well.  They are both sneezing everywhere and coughing up all kinds of hairballs!!

Seriously, I keep telling God that I don't have time to deal with all these animal 'issues.'  

If any of you knows anyone who has a heart for a special needs, very adorable and affectionate, West Highland Terrier please let me know!!!  We are in desperate need of finding good homes for all of our animals (minus the bird!).

Hearing from God in unexpected places...

ok, so here is the 'God story' from my trip to Wisconsin....

I was totally looking forward to this little road trip for a number of reasons.  I was really excited to spend some great time traveling with Ali.  I cherish any time that I can spend with my kids; especially one on one!  I couldn't wait to catch up with my life long friend Rhonda and her family.  I was looking forward to the wide open space and the much needed time to pause and listen for God in fresh new ways.

Ali & I had a great week catching up with dear old friends and I was thanking God for allowing us this time together and a chance for me to hit the pause button.  I was totally not expecting what happened the day before we came home. 

 Rhonda wanted me to visit her church with her.  She had described her church to me and told me how much she loved it...it sounded so much like VCC only on a much smaller scale.  The senior pastor had spent the entire summer in Europe with his wife and children and was not to be back until the following week.  Rhonda was really bummed as she wanted me to meet pastor Mike!  As we walked into the church....there he was!  I thought...cool...maybe I will get to meet him & we can chat about Europe!

The service began w/ a familiar worship song and then they paused to watch a video from World Vision.  Again, I was thinking...sweet!   a small country church with a vision for the world!!!  THEN pastor Mike got up to speak.  He had been away from his little church for 3 months and this was his first day back....he was so excited as he began to share about his summer in Europe!!!  HOW CRAZY!!  here I am sitting in the middle of the great outdoors....surrounded by corn fields and cows and this pastor is sharing with his church about the spiritual needs in Europe!!!  What are the chances....???  THEN he began his sermon.  The text was Elijah & Elisha.  This is what I had been reading in my personal quiet time!!!  MORE convergence!!!  His sermon was all about God calling us to partner with Him and how He wants to bless us as we learn to trust and obey Him!!!!  We looked at how Elisha responded to the call of God.  He said 'good-bye' to his mother & father and left!!!  At this point I was quite hot...not sure if it was just another 'hot flash' or the Holy Spirit!!!  He went on to share how often times we miss God's blessings because we are to afraid or insecure to trust God!!!  I was frozen...I seriously felt like I was the only person in the church and God was speaking through pastor Mike directly to ME!!!  It was such incredible confirmation ONCE AGAIN!!!  I was humbled by God's intimate love for me.  

It was a holy time.

I met pastor Mike after the service & shared with him that I was moving to Amsterdam in January with a team of folks to plant a church there.  He had spent several days in Amsterdam & met w/ the pastor of Crossroads International!!!  Bernie & I visited that church in May while in Amsterdam!!! 

CRAZY!!!!  and I'm sure I am leaving stuff out....it was just so crazy....SO like our God!!!

Obviously I returned home with a fresh new energy for this new chapter!!!  I am continually reminded of how much God loves us and wants us to know His will.  He is so incredibly BIG and EVERYWHERE and yet so intimate and personal.  I love how He is always surprising me!!  I love that He shows up in the most unexpected places and times!!

I love that He has no limits.  He is the God of Vineyard Columbus.  The God of Faith Community in New Richmond Wisconsin.  The God of Vineyard Amsterdam.....

and He desires to be known and heard!!!